Starlight
by Lady Drama
Summary: "People were wrong. Mikan was nothing like the blazing sunlight which faded away into the night. She was starlight, contentedly basking in her own eternal glow." Mikan and Natsume's relationship from Ruka's perspective.


**Disclaimer:** _I do not own Gakuen Alice._

**Summary:** _"People were wrong. She was nothing like the blazing sunlight which faded away into the night. She was starlight, contentedly basking in her own eternal glow." Mikan and Natsume's relationship from Ruka's perspective._

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><p>I looked at her as she stood before me, the wind blowing her brown hair across her face. She brushed it aside impatiently and continued to look out of the window, her expressive eyes betraying her anxiety.<p>

"How much longer Ruka-pyon?" she asked for the umpteenth time.

I tried to keep my own frustration at bay as I replied, "I don't know."

She seemed startled by my unusually harsh tone as she turned away from her contemplation of the path leading out of the forest. Natsume had mentioned that he would be returning to us using that road and she was determined to wait until he did.

"It's alright," whispered Mikan, placing one hand on my knee. "You know he's going to come back."

I stood up and exhaled loudly. Forcing a smile on my face, I said, "Of course I know. Don't worry, I'm fine now."

She didn't look convinced but nodded anyway and returned to the window. "You know I'm here if you want to talk."

That was just it. I didn't want to talk. Not to her, anyway. How could I explain jealousy to a girl who had been best friends with one of the most brilliant people of our generation and just started dating another? She had never envied Hotaru for her brains or blamed Natsume for his genius.

I wondered if it really was so bad, being the second best. Try as I would, I could not be angry with Natsume. We were too close for that. Even when I had lost Mikan to him, the only thing I felt was despair. I knew that I only had to ask for him to leave her. He would never hurt me deliberately. He had waited for years to ask her out to make sure that we didn't wind up competing against each other.

I never told him about my crush on Mikan in so many words but he guessed anyway and stayed away. But what I had felt never compared to his total dedication to her and I knew it. Besides, if anyone deserved the happiness that kind of love brought, it was Natsume.

But still, seeing them together as a couple brought up a question in my head: _How will I ever measure up to him?_ Although my Alice was strong, it wasn't even close to being as powerful as his. I was no leader, unlike him. I did not possess his quick brains and the insanely high IQ that led him to top exams with barely any effort.

True, I had as many fangirls as he did, but I didn't consider that an accomplishment since the only thing it led to was the dubious honour of being on the receiving end of Hotaru Imai's endless blackmailing schemes.

I pondered over my question as the moon continued to glow brightly in the night sky. The moonbeams swathed Natsume's room, in which Mikan and I were awaiting his return, in silvery light.

"I can't imagine how you found the courage to do this all these years, Ruka-pyon," said Mikan suddenly. My confusion must have been evident in my expression as she explained, "Watching. It's the hardest thing I've ever done. It's easy enough to fight. Most of that is just instinct and training. But no one can train you to wait for someone dear to return from a dangerous situation. I have no way of knowing whether he'll even come back but you're so sure. It takes a lot of loyalty to have that kind of faith in someone. And you always know just what to say to comfort someone. Whenever Natsume came back from a mission while we were kids, I could tell that he was upset, even though he tried to hide it. But I never knew just what to say, how to reach out to him. But for you it came naturally. Even people like Hotaru and Iinchou are comfortable around you. Right now too, you've been so patient with me."

"Mikan," I asked, "What are you trying to say?"

She blushed and said softly, "You're an amazing friend, Ruka-pyon."

I looked at her in growing amazement and then felt the blood rise in my own cheeks. I fought to keep it under control and said, in a voice that wasn't quite steady, "Thank you, Sakura-san."

People always said that Mikan was like a ray of sunshine. They were wrong. She was nothing like the blazing sunlight which faded away into the night. She was starlight, contentedly basking in her own eternal glow. She did not blind others with her own glory. Rather, she helped them see themselves as they truly were. But like starlight, she was gentle and disguised their faults so that they seemed illusory and easy to overcome. It was one of the reasons why she was perfect for someone as filled with self loathing as Natsume.

"Ruka, get me some water," commanded a husky voice from the windowsill. I looked up to see a black figure silhouetted against the light of the window.

As I went to his nightstand to pick up the glass of water kept there, I heard an exasperated sigh escape Natsume. "Polka, what the hell are you doing here?"

"I was waiting up for you, Natsume."

"Don't."

She pouted and I held back a grin as I handed Natsume the water. Another argument about to erupt between them and I sat down on the bed to watch the show.

I didn't have to wait very long. Natsume gulped down the contents of the glass quickly and turned his attention to her once more. He frowned.

"What are you still waiting for? Go."

"Why can't I wait up for you? Ruka does it all the time." An accusing finger was now pointed in my direction.

"Ruka doesn't hug me hard enough to break my ribs when I return. Also, he doesn't have a loud, whiny voice."

I winced. However a little colour was beginning to creep back into Natsume's ashen face and Mikan didn't seem as worried as she had been mere moments ago.

"I'M NOT LOUD!"

"Could you repeat that? I'm not sure the people in Central Town heard you."

As Mikan stormed off, slamming the door shut behind her, I said, "You didn't want her missing sleep on a school night."

"Stop sounding so damned _knowing_. You're spending too much time with Imai. Now wrap this up, will you?"

However, I couldn't stop grinning while bandaging the injured arm he had held out. He hit me on the back of my head with the other and said threateningly, "Only _one_ of my hands is injured."

I laughed and tied up the makeshift cloth he preferred to the Academy hospital's sophisticated Healing Alices.

Alright, I may have been a little faster than usual when heading for the exit. But then again, it was probably for the best. Especially since the smell of charred wood reached my nose just before I shut the door.

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><p>Review please?<p> 


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